How I Became an Atheist

 

When I became an atheist, it came as a surprise, even to me. I always strived to be holy,maybe like Mary. I have to say, the standards of purity the bible sets are unachievable, I mean, even your thoughts should not cross certain boundaries, and we all know that our minds can take us to he moon and back. It was one lovely afternoon, and I was reading stuff on the internet about God, click after click led me to a YouTube channel about people who died after mocking God, this include the guys who built the titanic. My brainwashed mind marveled at the power of the biblical god, how he strategically marked for death those who didn't respect his mighty name, the deity clearly wanted a lot of respect coming his way.

I also watched the sightings of angels in the skies, they were clouds, moulding slowly into humanly shapes, but to me, they were not sufficiently convincing. I've seen clouds looking like ducks and some looking like people's faces, I mean clouds can contort into anything. Then I saw the video that made me an atheist, it was titled "Evil God" by Underlings. It shocked me that someone could think this, let alone make a video about it. I felt a lot of pity for the maker of this video. It was the Mercy of God keeping him alive, this is the end of the world, my mind came up  with stuff that most believers would say. But I was curious to know why this guy thought that the god of the bible was evil, so I went ahead and clicked the video. I listened keenly, bit by bit. My reasoning capacities seemed to gain a life of their own. I was waking up from a deep slumber. My heart been fast as I stood up from my slouch on the sofa, now aware that the god of the bible was not real, and that if he was real, he would not be a likable character, he would be a ghastly dictator, an unfeeling monster.

"Its a lie!" I whispered to myself, I could not believe it. All that kneeling and shouting I had done at the church was for nothing, there would be not joyful heaven. I had wasted my time and money at the church, I had wasted my emotions too. I wanted to blame my parents and the authorities for filling my head with religiosity, for making me dedicate my time to a deity that landed in my country during colonialism, but I knew it would be no good. I decided to be grateful that I got to wake up, unlike many Africans who cling to it till death descends. I was excited about my discovery and there was this push for me to try to wake up other people. But as atheists, we all know how non-belief is regarded in this country. I was met with a vile resistance from those I tried to educate. 

I learned to be calm about my atheism (I am still learning). I know I cant force people to see the truth. I can only afford to be a good human, to show compassion to fellow human, be it a Hindu,a Christian or a Muslim. I know it is every persons right to believe what they want or choose. I only wish that those who believe in deities would learn to love atheists, stop killing atheists, stop associating them with the "Satan" character from their religious books and stop associating them with immorality.